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Songs from the Dustbowl

by PhemieC

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Tea Uem
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Tea Uem This album is really one of the best TF2 related album and really delves in the relationships of the mercs and even unrelated to the game, a great and tearjerking album with a deep empathetic songwriting Favorite track: On The Tram.
Shwinty
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Shwinty These songs were important to me when I was a teenager and I still love them years later, all of her works are good. And as for the "Medic is a not Nazi" comments, he's NOT a Nazi in canon but several of these were based on a fanfiction in which he was regrettably depicted as one in his youth.
Jeremy Walker
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Jeremy Walker an entire album about everyone's favorite mercs? sign me up.
(low point though is the describing medic as a nazi - why does anyone *want* him to be one? valve has actually stated he isn't.) Favorite track: Look At Me.
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1.
Dustbowl 02:32
How could you imply, that I'd leave you behind do you really think that I am quite that wise? I try to be the beast, and side with what lies least but in my mind I find holes the size of- Dustbowl, dustbowl, makes me wonder why I try to coddle, and care for, the rusting chains connecting you and I the days just turn themselves, like pages in a book falling from the shelf, into the fire I try to do the right thing, give back what I took but in the end it's all pretend and I'm just a liar in Dustbowl, dustbowl, makes me wonder how I knew I'd borrow, and battle, through every memory I spent with you
2.
Human Shield 03:16
I run outside before you, making holes that you can walk through like a child following footprints in the snow. You are my foundation, and beside you I'm a mountain, I am fortified, and I can only grow. And that's not all Haven't you, a man of science, ever wondered why I try so hard to make you feel so secure? Haven't you , with all your cleverness, devised the reason why I missed no hit and dodged no bullet, can't you see why I go through it? I want to be your human shield Be your cover in the field Be your strength when you have none Be your comfort when you're done Be the walls you live inside Be the hole where you can hide Be the safe in which you're sealed I want to be your human shield One I was withdrawn, but that loner now is gone Oh, how'd I stay so long in such a place without you? Once I was so strong but now to be alone feels wrong when I am invincible around you Haven't you, a man of science, ever wondered why I try so hard to make you feel so secure? Haven't you, with all your cleverness, devised the reason why I missed no hit and held no rancor? Haven't you felt so at ease while safe inside my company? See I am at my best as your bulletproof vest. I am your residence, your willing shade, the room in which your bed is made, your host, your home, your hive, your cave; oh can't you see how brave you make me? I want to be your human shield Be your cover in the field Be your strength when you have none Be your comfort when you're done Be the walls you live inside Be the hole where you can hide Be the safe in which you're sealed I want to be your human shield
3.
I sit outside the bar and I count all the stars in the sky, tonight. Billions of pieces all scattered apart, living separate lives. I recall all the times that I waited outside for my name to be called hundreds of faces, all freckled and white, well they came, they saw, they left, they came, they saw.... And I've seen all the beasties, I know all the reasons they say "be good, and eat your greens and mind all your manners, be careful, stay scared, monsters attack when you're unaware." But then, young and aching to prove I knew best, went out on my own to the lake of Loch Ness Two pale, freckled faces followed me there. I woke up less whole, but more aware. Now I feel entitled to the monsters I fight It brings out the light in my parents eyes I shouldv'e lost my sight on the lake that night 'Cause now all I see are monsters in human hides. Human hides.... I sit outside on patches of grass flecked by matches and cigarettes Bottle of scotch in one hand and I'm nauseous, as far as I get. I feel well-adjusted most of the time, the future looks brighter, I'm suturing mine. Plenty parts left of me, pieces to loose. I'm a breed so unique that I'm always excused. When I feel entitled to the monsters I fight It brings out the light in my parents eyes I shouldv'e lost my sight on the lake that night 'Cause now all I see are monsters in human hides. And I'm the Last True Knight, That's my God given right. I got the boom in my blood and I'll burn out bright I couldv'e lost my life on the lake that night but I'm immortal, a monster in a human hide. In a human hide A human hide I said a human hide In a human hide A human hide I said a human hide....
4.
We stand on a balcony, our knives at each-others necks And I've seen my fair share of war but never before have I not kept my temper in check. Driving me up all the walls, can't keep it all inside 'cause I tried and I failed every time so, what the hell.... And maybe it's my fault for getting involved with someone who stood back and just watched me fall over myself. But at least you didn't push me At least you didn't show up just to break me down yourself At least you didn't make me, or taunt me or tease me or trick me or put me through hell At least you didn't kill me, not this time I guess that's your little way of saying you're still mine You're still mine You're still mine Today I had you in my sights at least a dozen different times, but I'd hesitate. The things that you said get spit out of my head all around, by the time I pinned all of them down you'd escape. Sometimes you'll appear, out of thin air, whisper in my ear, I'll pretend you're not there until you fuss. Maybe it's your fault for getting involved with somebody so stunted they can't take the brunt of your lust. But at least I didn't push you At least I didn't shut you down and make you loose control At least I didn't leave you, deny you, ignore you or try to get away at all At least I didn't kill you, not this time. I guess that's my little way of saying you're still mine. You're still mine. You're still mine...... (Repeat)
5.
Anon 03:53
Key Biscayne, where the colours are the same as they were in the dress of the lady I left there. just like Italy or grand Paris or any other place with other mothers, daughters. Cut to the bone, we always fall alone, that's why I never call them back the morning after. Just straighten my tie, and never leave a sign, and don't respond with anything but laughter When they ask who I am I say "My dear, I wouldn't want to lie." When they say I've betrayed them I tell them I was never on their side Nevada, where the summers are raw, and the heat does not escape my silk and cotton. Stains of blood and sweat, go dripping down my hand, and fall onto the thirsty sand like rain. Cut to the bone, we always die alone, that's why I never bother to recall their name. Just straighten my tie, shake my head and sigh, right before the arrow hits my brain. And if they ask who I am I say "Gentlemen, I wouldn't want to lie." And when they say I've betrayed them I tell them I was never on their side I was never on their side In the Boston slums I found somebody numb, someone with an endless heart of patience, and I felt sick, at all the fights I picked, the things I'd done to all her many sons. And if she asks who I am I'll say "I'm nobody, I'm nothing, I'm anon." And if she begs me to stay I'll say "I'm sorry dear, but I must be along." Can you stay? Can you stay? I'm sorry, I must surely be along. Can you stay? Can you stay? Well okay, but not for very long. Can you stay? Can you stay? Well, okay. I said okay.
6.
Look At Me 03:09
If I wanted your opinion I'd ask your opinion. Don't need your Opinion. Give me your opinion! Out of left field, that's my deal. Young and wild is how I roll. Spin me 'round, put me down, wind me up, watch me go. I'm the best, there's no better. Check my sweater, you can see by the letter I'm a real go-getter kid. 60's Rockwell, Americana dream. Crooked smile and just some-teen. Now, look at me, please Attention all the ladies and the G's Betcha' never seen any moves like these Look at me, look at me, look at me, look at me, Look at me, look at me please. I'm a force, to be sure, and I won't be ignored Rather be dead than boring, and I won't say sorry So hate me, it just means I'm getting to you If I can't have love than attention will do Think that I care? Well I don't. Think I will, but I won't be back home, I got places to be. Hittin' the pavement as fast as I can, I'll flip you the bird with a bandaged hand so you'll.... Look at me, please Attention all the ladies and the G's Betcha' never seen any moves like these Look at me, look at me, look at me, look at me, Look at me, look at me, look at me, look at me, Look at me, look at me, look at me, look at me, Look at me, look at me, look at me, look at me, Look at me, look at me, look at me, look at me, Look at me, look at me, look at me please.... What have you done? Put the boy in his box Thought that you'd won, Until he pulled up his socks. And he said "I'm gonna race you." he said "I'm gonna race you." he said "I'm gonna race you." he said "I'm gonna race you."
7.
On The Tram 03:33
Your mother loves a man who took your face and cut your spine got a baseball bat in hand to make him pay for your lost time on the tram I saw a boy, laughing, lounging and terrified on the battlefield he picks up his heels 'cause speed's what keeps him alive on the inside To your father, you're a curse how could you let your country down? And it just kept getting worse so you bought a van and you ditched that town On the tram I saw a man, 6'4 and back again got a scar across his cheek I wish I knew where he had been but I just met him on the tram From your skinny legs, to the smoke on your breath from the one missing eye, to the bottle of death From your looming shadow, to your booming roar to your stern looking friend who survived the war from your hard hat and goggles, to your shovel and boots to the woman in the back all quiet and mute I've seen you before and I'll see you again You're not quite a stranger but you're not quite a friend On the tram that day I saw someone I won't soon forget what a shock to see them at all I almost wish we'd never met (x2) but that's how it is on the tram.
8.
Scar Tissue 03:48
I'm in a mess, I can't take all this stress All the violence and death that I cause, I confess I just want to burn it all. Little ants running around all annoyed when their toys are destroyed, All those tiny ant boys I just want to burn them all. I can't feel anything, I just taste oxygen, and the fire's all I have to look forward to. Just exit wounds and agony, asbestos and sepsis and atrophy and Scar tissue. I'd act my age if I knew what it was Now my face is in place, but who knows if it's changed? I just want to burn it all. And all of my friends are flammable men, I would ask them if I thought that they'd understand Why I burn it all. I can't feel anything, I just taste rubber and oxygen, and the warmth of the fire's all I have to look forward to. The screams and the silence, then after they're burned they get up again And sometimes I forget my true friends Don't even know that I'm human With scar tissue. I'm in a mess, I can't take all this stress All the violence and death that I cause, I confess I just want to burn it all And all of my friends are flammable men, I would ask them if I thought that they'd understand Why I burn it all, It all, with my- With my scar tissue. Scar tissue. Scar tissue. La la la la la.
9.
Texas Skies 02:24
I wanna show you that the world is not unkind It is damaged, it is damaged It is still perfectly fine Pack your things, we're going home Imagine Texas Skies instead of stone I wanna show the world That you are not unkind You are damaged, you are damaged You are still perfectly fine Pack your things, we're going home Imagine Texas Skies instead of stone I wanna show the world
10.
Docteur 05:48
All in all I think I'd call this operation a success closed the gash and sewed a patch to cover up this little mess dying is much worse than being dead they say, they sewed the patch to cover up the mess, what's stitches long erode Everybody thinks I'm getting worse but really I am saved Seen the truth split wide and used, sterilized and autoclaved Dying isn't half as bad as waiting for the knife to fall Arrow, blade or hand grenade, I've made love to them all And where did the colors go? running out their bodies flowing always redder where did the doctor go? let him know he's needed on the floor And where did the colors go? running out their bodies flowing always bluer where did the doctor go? let her know she's needed on the floor Needed on the floor Newborn accidents are being sent to to their inheritance Is it good to be hotblooded or is it a hindrance? Some may say that being born is worse than the alternative but just as long as you embrace me, I will make you want to live And where did the colors go? running out their bodies flowing always redder where did the doctor go? Let him know he's needed on the floor? And where did the colors go? running out their bodies flowing always bluer where did the doctor go? let her know she's needed on the floor Needed on the floor Needed on the floor Where did the colours go? Where did the doctor go? Where did the colours go?....
11.
The End 04:24
"Give the man his dignity" you say, as I take off my mask. And your eyes say I am dying, but I still have to ask. The sea air tears at my burnt lungs as I make my last request. Then, handing you my faith, I lay back in your arms to rest. And now you hold my one hand with such care and yes I am afraid to die but more of what will meet me there, but.... I never hated you. How could I hate what never was? I made my peace with you and God and fire, and all because.... I never hated you. How could I hate a friend Who treats a monster like a man and stays until the end? Until The End. I remember feeling pain. True, some stays with me 'till this day. And I could see you were the same as I though flames kept you at bay. I was a child then, in my tiny house turned living hell. And though law marked you a man, that night you were a child as well. And I can tell As you look down at me you are a healer now and not a nazi, and.... I never hated you. How could I hate what never was? I made my peace with you and God and fire, and all because.... I never hated you. How could I hate a friend Who treats a monster like a man and stays with him until the end? Until The End.

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Eleven songs about nine immortal mercenaries trapped in an endless war.

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released June 5, 2015

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PhemieC Toronto, Ontario

I'm PhemieC (fem-ee-see). I'm a singer and songwriter from Manitoba, Canada (previously Toronto). My songs are character studies, therapy, or both. Some of my stuff is fan music, but all of it is 100% original and completely self-produced. Thank you for your support <3 ... more

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